Servant

Sometimes I miss the obvious. It finally dawned on me as I was purging all that we own tidying up that my entire role right now is to be a servant. I don't have a job outside the home anymore.  No other responsibilities. And that is a holy and beautiful thing. It's an honor to serve. No one is more like Jesus than when they're serving others and I've been given the gift to be able to focus entirely on serving those dearest to me. I think that's one of the lessons I needed to learn before #3 comes because that service is about to escalate. It's so, so easy to get bogged down in the drudgery of wiping noses and disciplining all day that I miss what a privilege it is to parent these little people and to serve my husband.

When I worked, Tom and I divided household chores much more equally. That's changed and rightfully so, but my attitude has not been great about that. It's been a paradigm shift for me to take ownership of some of these things that I used to consider "Tom's job." Please no one think I am suggesting he doesn't do anything. He does so much, lots of it without being asked, and all with a great attitude. For example, Saturday, he kept the boys quiet in the morning so I could nap, then took them out of the house for a few hours, letting me stay home and get things done uninterrupted. Then he stayed home at naptime so I could get together with girldfriends. Are you kidding??? He did that entirely on his own, not one word from me. And that kind of thing happens often, so no one get the wrong idea.  What I'm talking about are random household things that Tom used to do that it makes more sense for me to handle, since I'm the one that's in the house all day. I finally grasp now that not only is it my function in this house, it's my privledge and my honor to serve. This has completely changed my attitude as I go through the day. That's why I'm writing it down. I'll forget this in 30 seconds and need to go re-read it.

Same with the boys. I am kept busy all day long tending to their needs. And that can wear after awhile. And it still does, but remembering that it's my HONOR to serve them changes my outlook. Serving them also includes discpline, teaching them how to do things for themselves and showing them how to contribute to the household, so please don't mis-understand me. But little ones need things done for them almost constantly and understanding that this is being the hands and feet of Jesus as well impacts my attitude.

I've been looking lately for ways externally to serve people. And there's nothing wrong with that. It's good and those opportunities will present themselves when the time is right. But I think what I'm being shown now is that there is ample opportunity under my nose to be humble and serve. And this is my highest calling right now and there is nothing that is more Christ-like or biblical than that.  I can't fathom another season of life where I have the opportunity to pour out my energy on those closest to me more than I do right now.

There is scripture after scripture about putting others first. Here's just one example.

Put yourself aside, and help others get ahead. Don't be obsessed with getting your own advantage. Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand. (Phil 2:3-4, The Message)

In the past, I would read something like that and think about what that looked like financially, to sacrifice to give money to someone. Or maybe how we could do something for another family, etc. Now, I read that and see that it's just as true applied in our home as anywhere else. Imitating Christ's humility starts with my actions and attitude towards my husband and children. That is such an obvious statement that I'm a little chagrined to write it. If anyone else is a slow learner, I hope it saves you some time. On some level, I knew that already but I hadn't really internalized it and embraced it yet. I think, just in the nick of time, I finally figured out what lesson I should have been learning these rough past few months. This was a humbling lesson for me to learn. It was hard to face up to how I had viewed my responsibilities versus how God views them. It was hard to admit to myself, much less on a blog, that I had been wrong in many ways. But on the other side, I feel freedom in embracing this season in a way I hadn't felt before. So, I decided to blog about it in hopes that someone else is encouraged. These days at home have eternal, kingdom impact on little hearts watching and learning.

My house is a holy place.

So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed. John 8:36